MY FEEBLE HEART

I wish it was possible to have my brain completely override my heart. I mean, how many times have I known that I really should hate someone, and I can't? I wish so much that it was really that easy. To acknowledge that I should, and then that's it. It's over.

Last night we had a great Buffy party, of course. Afterwards, I had two different people talk to me and ask me why I can't date people who are more like my ex. Who just so happens to be exactly what and who I always wanted. I know I couldn't marry him again, but I also know that the person my heart last fell in love with will never be half the person Michael is, simply because he will never choose to be. And even when I realized that, I couldn't force myself not to be in love with him.

Oh, well. Maybe the thing to learn is that you have to do what you have to do in spite of your heart.

This lesson sucks, in my humble opinion.

Anyway, I didn't get enough sleep last night (hellooooo, insomnia!) and I have too much to do today. More later.