I'M A LESBIAN!

Friday night I went to Matrix III with my friend, Sarah. It was rubbish, but not as rubbishy as we thought it was going to be, so a good time was had by all. Afterwards, we went to a nearby pub.

When we got to the pub, I ended up putting on red Hedwig lips to demonstrate...something. It escapes me at the moment, but trust me, it made sense at the time. A woman who had obviously had more than her share of E that evening thought that my lips were the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, as evidenced by the fact that she told me so at least 30 times in the space of 10 minutes.

After we left the pub, we decided to see if we could find any place to buy alcohol. Of course we couldn't--it was almost 1 a.m. But, knowing that I had several bottles of wine at home, we headed back toward my place.

About 5 blocks from my flat, we saw two men get out of a mini cab. Somehow in the tussle, one of the men got punched and landed on his back, banging the back of his head against the concrete. By the time we reached them, he was standing, and blood was literally pouring out of his nose and mouth. I walked a few paces and called an ambulance, while Sarah tried to keep the man conscious and holding his nose. Both of the two men who got out of the cab were very stoned, but I guess that just goes without saying. The one who wasn't bleeding held several conversations with Sarah's breasts, and with mine.

When the ambulance arrived, the bleeding man's pervert friend turned to me and Sarah and said, "So...are you two...together?"

"Why, yes, yes we are," we responded simultaneously.

And that's how I became a lesbian.

I've never been a lesbian before. Well, that's not strictly accurate. When I moved into my flat, my flatmate gave me the keyson a long chain, because you have to open two door locks at once, and the two locks are kind of far apart. Keys on a chain. Yup. I'm a lesbian.

So Sarah and I stayed up until about 4 am talking, and then spent Saturday wandering around Camden, shopping. She bought a skirt for this Event we're going to later this month. At some point in the afternoon, she said something about not being a lesbian, and I said, "That's not what you said last night."

I have waited my *whole life* to say that line.

In other news, I spent almost all of my remaining money on an acoustic guitar. Mind you, what I really need is a keyboard, but a) I can't afford one, and b) if I bought one over here, I'd have that whole power-conversion thing to deal with when I go back to the States, and so all in all I figured it would be better to buy a guitar.

I had to have *some* kind of a musical instrument. I've been going crazy. I mean, really stark, raving mad. I can't handle going this long without being in a band or something, and although I managed all right when I was too sick to walk, now that I'm mobile again, not making some kind of music is driving me nuts. I have a violin, but the noises I make on it can't really be described as "music."

I'm feeling really guilty about buying this. I guess...well, there are people in my life who are suffering financially, and I could have given the money I spent on this guitar to them. Someone asked me if I could lend her money, and I didn't have it. But then I made the choice to sacrifice eating anything interesting for the rest of the month in order to get this guitar (although that's not strictly true, since I had sushi the other day, to which I am addicted), but the thing is that I didn't make that same decision and send that same money to her.

Mind you, the amount she needed was far more than this guitar cost, and I honestly didn't have it at all. But I feel like I should have sent as much as I spent on this guitar.

I think I rationalise things too easily.